Some Nights.

So, it's all beginning to be more real than ever. While I should be studying for finals, I can't help but sit here and think of this year ending. (Might I add that the outcomes of my final exams may not be so great this semester...?) In fact, I'm tearing up at the mere thought of not living at Purdue for three months. The past year has been the most incredible experience for me. I have met incredible people, learned incredible things, and discovered myself throughout this incredible process. My dear, I can't fathom what this summer is going to be like. No matter what the outcome of the exams I take, no matter what the grades I receive in my classes, I have most definitely accomplished the best things of my life this year.I have discovered many things about myself- my love for coffee, my adoration for Red Bull, my need to be around people who know me, my incredibly weird study habits, my greatly complicated thought process, and so much more. I must say that this whole college thing is much more beneficial to my life than people hint at.

I have to say, these months of my first year at Purdue are ones I will never forget. I was asked what my favorite part of my life has been and while other people answered the same question, I couldn't help but actually realize that this time in my life, these moments right now, they're the best part of it all. After all, what other years have beat it out? When else could I have realized that the person I am isn't so bad in the end? There is a song by Fun. that says "What do I stand for? Most nights, I don't know anymore." If I had to explain where I came from in August 2011, it was there. I had no idea who I was or what I wanted people to think of me. However, right now, in April of 2012... I'm feeling pretty good. I stand for the things that matter and I am so confident in the woman I have become, I can hardly keep it contained. I know, I've kind of posted about this same things before, but I can't help it! I am so amazed by what has happened in my life this year. So, as the boxes are packed and my walls empty the secrets they've contained for the year, I vow to hold myself together. I vow to not cry anymore and to know that the people I've met and memories I've made will stick with me throughout the rest of my life.

On another note, there are people who I need to thank. I write online, a lot actually, and through that I have met some of the greatest people you would ever meet. Kearstin, Meghan, Amber, Mandy, Ashley, Kat, and Mikayla, thank you. Thank you from the deepest part of my being for knowing who I am and still accepting me. Thank you for dealing with my obnoxious rambling, my most random moments, my constant confusion, and most of all, for dealing with my needy tendencies. You're all fabulous and if there is anything I can do for you, please never hesitate to ask. Meghan - just thank you for never failing me and never ignoring me just because I'm confused, not making sense, or being the most ridiculous person ever. Kearstin - I can't thank you enough for helping me find out things about me that other people never could have realized. I know you're having a rough time right now, but you'll get through it. Amber - I don't even know where to start. Just thank you for everything. Ashley - thanks for getting me through some really rough patches in my life. Mandy - you know what you've done for me and I greatly appreciate you.

xx Madison Rose

"Some nights, I wish that this all would end, 'Cause I could use some friends for a change."